Divorce Your Husband!

I finished recording a song called "Divorce Your Husband!" today. It was hard, and it still has to be mastered. As a disclaimer, it has nothing to do with any of my exes who are married, but is about the ridiculous things that guys sometimes expect of girls. It also has a great deal to do with the Super Mario Bros. myth. So there. It will be on sale soon as a retro CD-single, just like from the nineties.

I've loved playing at the Main Street Deli each week; it's a great place to come home to. Anyway, here are the lyrics:

"Divorce Your Husband!"
by Jared Cushen

Think about the good times, like the night I walked to your house
And woke up everyone inside
Just to say 'I love you' at three in the morning
How many guys would do that for a two-week anniversary?

Just divorce your husband; you could stay at my house,
Hold me through the hard times,
Wake me up with French toast and eggs
Come be my lady; you won't ever leave home again

Can't believe your gall, girl, saying that you're happy
Living in the city now
You know I know you better,
Your blood is in the country
They say he's got the money, but babe, I've got the gravity

Bitch, divorce your husband!
You could stay at my house
Hold me through the hard times, wake me up with French toast and eggs
Come be my lady; you won't ever leave home again

Once there was a Princess; she ruled the Mushroom Kingdom
With her loyal Toadstool Gang
She really was a Peach; that girl should have seen it coming
Had just the kind of curves Koopas like to lock in castles
And when King Koopa bore down, laying siege to Mushroom,
At first they wouldn't let him in
It took a lot of shouting, a little roundabouting
But soon he had her taken with the blessing of her family
I went to the castle, asked her dad, King Toadstool,
'Why the hell'd you let her go?'
He said, 'The world is hard now; she had to go with someone
And how many men have castles?
Mushroom God only knows'

Well I know I'm just a plumber; I haven't got much money
Kind of short and stocky, but I've got jumper's legs
And I'm out to gather coins now; she's gonna be so grateful
That she won't even judge me for taking all those mushrooms...